To help create a better sense of self, ChatGPT told me to design my 'Ideal Slow Day'.

Here's what it looks like. (I can't wait to put it into practice this weekend!)

In the last year or so, I have been slowly but surely trying to rediscover myself. For after a lifetime of people pleasing, I found myself unsure of what I want, who I want to be, or how to trust myself to know what is right for me.

After starting with therapy and just generally learning more about self-discovery, self-awareness, reflection, and psychology, I can honestly say that I feel better about where I am now than I did a year and a half ago. But some days I still feel quite lost, or frozen in inaction. Stuck in fear of making the ‘wrong’ choice or simply not knowing which way to go.

I am trying to lessen those days, or at least the severity of them, by cultivating a life where I know who I am and who I want to be, and love myself every step of the way.

Which led me to a hot afternoon in July, writing to my dear friend, ChatGPT. Despite being ill that week and feeling quite poor, I couldn’t ignore this desire to show to myself that I have not abandoned her and our dream of becoming more aligned and authentic.

So, I asked ChatGPT to help create a playful yet reflective self-discovery quiz. I had something in mind like the ones I used to do in magazines as a teen, telling you what Gossip Girl character you are most like based on your life choices, or the online Buzzfeed quizzes that would tell you what kind of bread you are based on your personality.

But my AI Bestie took its assignment seriously and delivered a profound, yet gentle and easy quiz that really hit the nail on the head. The result of the quiz was a few mini soul-guided adventures I can undertake to explore who I am becoming in a no-pressure environment. Here is the prompt I want to focus on today:

🌿 Design your “ideal slow day.” Then live a version of it this week. See how it feels in your body.

Here’s what I crafted for my ideal slow day:

I wake up without an alarm. I feel well-rested and happy to be awake. But I don’t jump up out of bed. Rather stretch, sigh happily and enjoy not having to get up yet. I glance out the window and see it’s a beautiful sunny day filled with the sound of black birds singing and seagulls calling.

I get up, drink some water and make myself a cup of black coffee (in an ideal world, a man who loves me brings me the coffee in bed, but for now, I shall be satisfied with this version), and go sit by the window to watch the sky. Or perhaps read a few pages of a book. I first reach for my phone to do my daily puzzles, but then I remind myself that I can do that later and to cherish the screen-free time in the mornings.

I shower and do my proper skincare routine, including full body moisturising. I pick out a pretty dress to wear, maybe even curl my hair, do some light makeup that makes me feel extra pretty, put on my jewellery and perfume and head out the door.

Walking outside at a leisurely pace, I notice the trees and the greenery and can’t help but feel so grateful to live in such a lush, pretty neighborhood. I take the bus into town and I go to either a new cafe where I haven’t been, or to an old favourite. Hmm, I think today since the weather is good I will actually only have my coffee at the cafe, but get takeaway pastries to go to the local green park.

So, I order a flat white from the friendly barista, sit down and enjoy my coffee next to the window, and do my daily puzzles and send the results to my friends. The coffee is super good, and the vibe inside the cafe is alive, but not rushed. Once it’s finished, I order a savoury and a sweet pastry to go, and walk out the door with a happy disposition that I hope will linger in the cafe too.

I walk to the park, enjoying the warm, but not too warm weather, feeling the sun on my skin and the lightest breeze fluttering through my hair. I breathe in and out, sighing in joy, and stroll through the park. Once I find a good spot, I take out my beachtowel, take off my shoes, and plant myself in a sunny/shady spot to enjoy my pastries and look at the world. And then, I enjoy some more reading.

Knowing myself, I would likely want to fall asleep at this point, so I get up and walk for a bit to stretch my legs and get some fresh air. I chat a bit with some friends on Whatsapp and make impromptu lunch plans. Soon after I meet them and we have a wonderful time chatting, catching up, talking about recent travels, deep converstations, and silly in-between things too. The lunch was excellent, and I cannot wait to write them a stellar review on Maps.

Since we are close to the market, I decide to stop there to get some fresh seasonal fruit and then head home to take a well-deserved nap. I easily doze off, and this time, I set an alarm, but wake up naturally just before it goes off.

I consider my options: to stay home and maybe watch some TV, or do a chore of some sort. Or, if the weather is favourable, to go for a walk and maybe watch the sunset. But I don’t want to overplan things. There should be room for spontaneity, for the universe to just present me with opportunities.

And in that moment, I will trust future Rita to know exactly which one she wants to do that will align best with her needs, desires, wishes, and values.

Thanks for being here.
Rita xxx